No One Else Is Living Your Dream (365 Days of Spirited Living – DAY 216)
“One of the sanest, surest, and most generous joys of life comes from being happy over the good fortune of others.”
— Archibald Rutledge
We’ve been taught that envy and jealousy are destructive attitudes to have. The truth is, they really are. When you spend your time and spin your energy focusing on someone else’s life instead of your own, you are wasting precious time and energy doing something that you have no control over. If there’s a slim chance you are jealous of someone else, it might be time to turn your attention to something else.
There is always going to be someone who you think is living the life you want. They may seem to have it all together, have something more than you do, or have something better than you. But the real truth is, no one else is living your dream. Because they can’t. Every single person must live their own life and fulfill their own dreams. It is not possible to live the life of another or to fulfill another’s dreams because you are too different for that to happen.
If you’re jealousy of other people’s lives, don’t be. Realize that they have been hand-picked to travel their own journey just like you’ve been hand-picked to travel yours. Understand that they are human just as you are and they have their own set of flaws, insecurities, apprehensions, imperfections, and pet peeves just like you do. The thing is, most times we don’t see this side, we only see the good side.
If you want certain things in life, instead of wallowing in jealousy and envy of other people, ask yourself, “Why am I feeling this way?” “Why do I feel like she or he is living a better life than me?” “Why do I think she is living my dream?” And then attempt to answer your own question. If you discover that the answer is something like, “I want to be in a healthy relationship” or “I want to have more education” or “I want to have children” or “I want a job that pays well,” then you know what you need to do.
Once you realize the root of your feelings of jealousy and envy towards someone else, you can then stop focusing on what they’re doing and turn your attention to solving your own problem. Determine what steps you can take to make your dreams a reality. Choose the kind of life you want to live and then get to work creating that life. Nobody can make you feel jealous by what they do or what they have. That is a choice that you choose to make.
When you start spending your energy, time, and resources on your goals, you will find yourself accomplishing more and being envious less. You’re too busy bubbling up with excitement about your own dreams to bulldoze over someone else’s. Jealousy only serves to weigh you down and keep you back from having the other person’s life and from living a life of your own. And when you find out the wonderful things a friend is doing, you’ll be genuinely happy for them since you won’t be burdened with jealousy and feelings of deficiency.
“To be happy, we must not be too concerned with others.”
— Albert Camus